|From: Dean Hughson <email@example.com>
Subject: [GEN-M] the death of a marriage as seen by an undertaker
I just read a fantastic book, The
Undertaking-Life: Studies from the dismal trade, by Thomas Lynch. Lynch,
a Michigan undertaker is also a poet.
I bought the book originally because it was an essay on life through the eyes of
someone who sees death. It was very highly recommended as a good book in the New
york Times book reviews recently. However, it had a good section on divorce.....
He tells the story of a friend of his who got embroiled in a tough divorce and became
conversant in case law and precedent, show-cause, suit and countersuit. 'When he
once referred to his sons as "the minor children," I objected. I could not
bear to hear these beautiful boys who had their mother's wisdom and their father's brains,
his dark humour and her brown eyes, called anything but precious. He kept crafting
his testimony and his closing arguments for a day in court I told him would never come.
The billable hours on both sides were plentiful.
Once the litigants had spent all they had saved toward the boys' college
educations, the attorneys, well paid for the rattling of sabers and the launching of
salvos, met over sushi, divided the spoils, and agreed to meet for golf the following
weekend, weather and caseloads permitting.
It was done.
Good counsel, near as anyone could figure, was unequivocally and
Sometimes it takes someone who is skilled in death, to write about the death of a
mariage in an understandable way. How many of us (myself included) have got lost in
the spirit of battle,egged on by our paid warriors, not realizing that at the end of a
battle, most battlefields are filled with bodies and no winners.
p.s. take my word---the book is worth reading
Dean Hughson, DIVORCE HOMEPAGE http://hughson.com
and THE EGGMAN HOMEPAGE http://hughson.com/eggman/
tel 702-360-5419, fax 702-360-5398 firstname.lastname@example.org
For Male College Students — A Short Guide to the Truth, by Angry