NO CHILD ABOARD

NO CHILD ABOARD is a CD produced by DISPLACED DADS [an Australian rock band]

Thank you for buying this CD.

This CD is dedicated to all those non-custodial parents who have been harassed, coerced or intimidated out of their children's lives against their will.  We hope you find solace in these songs.
    Although these songs refer mainly to non-custodial men, we understand that they apply equally to non-custodial women who have had their children taken from them against their will.  We object to the win/lose mentality which NO language changes can disguise.
    The ONLY way of addressing this situation is to have 50:50 parenting, where  the children have equal time with BOTH parents.

Index to lyrics and to links of downloadable files of some individual songs

Suppression Why Why Why? Language I Must Be Dumb Sad Situation Mommy Where Is Daddy?

Crappy Fathers Day Men are all sick bastards Nuts Big Mistake Men Out There Father's Love

Here are the words:

1. Suppression

If you’re a man in these sorry days,
You’re suppressed, you can't express any of your ways.
Unless you accept that men are all evil and cruel,
Well, you'll be branded, so you're better off staying cool.

Don’t you know, any man who opens his mouth
Is labelled as a red-neck from the South.
He's a right-wing militant chauvinist pig
On a patriarchal power trip. 

Yeah.  Everyone knows men deserve to be stereotyped. 

So when men get together, to air their common voice,
To raise concerns about custody to get children more choice,
When all this is said and done, the man is seen as bad.
The man is seen as a right-wing backlash, he's seen as mad.

Don’t you know, any man who opens his mouth
Is labelled as a red-neck from the South.
He's a right-wing militant chauvinist pig
On a patriarchal power trip. 

Yeah.  Everyone knows men deserve to be stereotyped. 

So men I ask you to all be strong.
Trust in your feelings, that something's terribly wrong.
It is not natural for a father to be ostracised,
And those who condone this are just living lies.

Don’t you know, any man who opens his mouth
Is labelled as a red-neck from the South.
He's a right-wing militant chauvinist pig
On a patriarchal power trip. 

Yeah.  Everyone knows men deserve to be stereotyped. 

A normal man in our society
Is expected to accept with complacency
The loss of his children, it’s all seen as O.K..
It’s the abnormal men like us who complain.

Don’t you know, any man who opens his mouth
Is labelled as a red-neck from the South.
He's a right-wing militant chauvinist pig
On a patriarchal power trip. 

Yeah.  Everyone knows men deserve to be stereotyped. 

Everyone knows men deserve to be stereotyped.

(Available as a downloadable MP3 file suppression.mp3 (2,867kB))

---

2. Why Why Why?

It's been a year or so since my wife told me to go,
And then she started packing her case.
The case stood twenty feet tall
From the ceiling to the floor.
And I'll tell you the contents of that case

So why why why?
When it's the kids who always cry,
Why won't you agree to joint custody?

Well, she took the ironing board
And the paintings on the wall
She took the fridge, TV and stereo too.
She took the microwave and bed,
But the one thing she never said
Was that the kids were her possessions too

So why why why?
When it's the kids who always cry,
Why won't you agree to joint custody?

She marched them into that case.
They had tears rolling down their face.
They said, Daddy oh Daddy we love you.
Well, she took those kids away,
And of course I had no say,
But for a father that's nothing new.

So why why why?
When it's the kids who always cry,
Why won't you agree to joint custody?

I broke up with my spouse.
I lost possessions and the house,
And all of this is not a problem to bear.
But I never broke up with my kids,
And that's not how they want to live.
Well, it's wrong to put them in that packing case.

So why why why?
When it's the kids who always cry,
Why won't you agree to joint custody?

(Available as a downloadable MP3 file why.mp3 (2,489 KB))

---

3. Language

Well, I love language, it's such a joke.
We call things by different names, and then its oky doke.
When you kill someone its murder, but you're encouraged in a war.
When you kill a race it’s ethnic cleansing, it's not genocide any more

You see, Mommy does the day-to-day caring,
And Daddy's just a fat cheque book.
It's the social order of the day,
Paternal bonding's overlooked.

Are we all stupid?  Or do they think we are?
Society's trying to tell me, custody doesn't happen anymore.
They accept words like residence and contact now exist.
Well, I can't tell the difference.  ‘Cause their father, my children still miss.

You see, Mommy does the day-to-day caring,
And Daddy's just a fat cheque book.
It's the social order of the day,
Paternal bonding's overlooked.

Put the emphasis on children.  We'll forget the parent's rights.
We'll couch everything to make sole custody seem all right,
Who treats children as possessions?
Well, it sure wasn't me!  Who has 85 percent of custody?

You see, Mommy does the day-to-day caring,
And Daddy's just a fat cheque book.
It's the social order of the day,
Paternal bonding's overlooked.

If they wanted to stop the possession mentality,
Society could have done that so easily.
All they had to do was introduce equal custody,
But instead the social system is destroying paternity.

You see, Mommy does the day-to-day caring,
And Daddy's just a fat cheque book.
It's the social order of the day,
Paternal bonding's overlooked.

Well, my language is different.  My language reflects my truth,
They were taken from me.  My children are very confused.
So take your fancy language, and take your forked tongue.
I can see this new-age discourse only benefits the moms

You see, Mommy does the day-to-day caring,
And Daddy's just a fat cheque book.
It's the social order of the day,
Paternal bonding's overlooked.

I’m disenchanted, and I am confused.
Why tell me about your language changes, when the result is that I still lose!
I still don't see my children, as often as a parent should.
This politically correct language, it only works for motherhood!

You see, Mommy does the day-to-day caring,
And Daddy's just a fat cheque book.
It's the social order of the day,
Paternal bonding's overlooked.

---

4. I Must Be Dumb

I must be dumb, and I must be blind,
I must be clear outta my mind,
I must be weird, I must be insane,
'Cause I can feel my children's pain.

I once lived with my kids,
And I saw them day to day.
Now I'm more like an Uncle,
And maintenance I must pay.

I must be dumb, and I must be blind,
I must be clear outta my mind,
I must be weird, I must be insane,
'Cause I can feel my children's pain.

That's when the penny dropped,
As a man I should not care,
Society has no recognition
Of what I consider fair.

I must be dumb, and I must be blind,
I must be clear outta my mind,
I must be weird, I must be insane,
'Cause I can feel my children's pain.

I'll cop it sweet and I'll smile,
I'll pretend it does not hurt,
But the pain I see in my children,
Really brings me back down to earth,

I must be dumb, and I must be blind,
I must be clear outta my mind
I must be weird, I must be insane,
'Cause I can feel my children's pain.

Aboriginals of this land,
Had their children taken away,
Yet this very same practice
Still happens to fathers today,

I must be dumb, and I must be blind,
I must be clear outta my mind,
I must be weird, I must be insane,
'Cause I can feel my children's pain.

I really do object,
To the possession mentality,
Should anyone have the right
To stop my child from seeing me?

I must be dumb, and I must be blind,
I must be clear outta my mind,
I must be weird, I must be insane,
'Cause I can feel my children's pain.

(Available as a downloadable MP3 file dumb.mp3 (2,850kB))

---

5. Sad Situation

In a sea of illusions two foes go to war.
What does it all mean?  What are they fighting for?
A little girl named Susan, her upbringing's at stake,
One of the parties 's too bitter to contemplate.

Well it's a sad situation.
There just ain’t no winners at all.
This win/lose ownership mentality is the cause.

The father sits wondering about his little girl,
How she must miss him in her tiny world.
Susan is confused, she has a disappearing Dad,
A man who pops in and out of her life like an Uncle or a Granddad!

Well, it's a sad situation.
There just ain’t no winners at all.
This win/lose ownership mentality is the cause.

The mother has possession; she owns that little girl.
She'd rather have her in daycare than in her daddy's world.
Who is the power freak?  Who is after all?
Who thinks she has the right to exclude the father at all?

Well, it's a sad situation,
There just ain’t no winners at all
This win/lose ownership mentality is the cause.

The father goes to battle, to do what is right.
But he's painted as a monster, you know the mother's always right.
The system is archaic, it's a dichotomous mess.
Why can't both parents give the child all their best?

Well, it's a sad situation.
There just ain’t no winners at all.
This win/lose ownership mentality is the cause.

---

6. Mommy Where Is Daddy?

Mommy where is Daddy?
You know I love him so.
You know that I miss him,
But I just don't know

You always tell me
That it's better this way.
You never asked me,
And I didn't get a say.

Why can't I see him half the time?
I thought that would be fair.
How come you think you own me?
I think of my feelings you don't care!

I know daddy loves me.
It's so easy to see.
Why are you preventing
What should be so naturally? 

Daddy has to go to court
Because you disagree,
About what you pretend to know,
About what's best for me.

Why can't I see him half the time?
I thought that would be fair.
How come you think you own me?
I think of my feelings you don't care!

I know that you and Daddy
Don't love each other so.
Why must I miss out
'Cause you told him to go? 

I wish I'd gone with Daddy.
He loves me more than you.
He taught me how to share.
That's something you won't do.

Why can't I see him half the time?
I thought that would be fair.
How come you think you own me?
I think of my feelings you don't care!

(Available as a downloadable MP3 file wheresdad.mp3 (1,810kB))

---

7. Crappy Fathers Day

Awake at 6:00 a. m., with my kids bouncing on the bed.
Happy father's day Daddy, we love you, that's what they said.
Well, I'm woken by the alarm, there's no noise anywhere.
I realised I was dreaming 'cause my children do not live here

‘Cause it’s another crappy fathers day in a sexist town,
Where the women get the children and Dads are outward bound!

Some people endorse this atrocity.
They say that it’s better this way, but I disagree.
I go make my breakfast and stare at the empty chairs.
There's no laughing or giggling, just silence in the air.

‘Cause it’s another crappy fathers day in a sexist town,
Where the women get the children and Dads are outward bound!

I have visions of my children here,
As I wipe away the billionth tear.
All I wanted was joint custody,
So the children could see and know their daddy.

‘Cause it’s another crappy fathers day in a sexist town,
Where the women get the children and Dads are outward bound!

I go to my car.  Yeah, it's the crappy one.
It's the one that doesn't have kid’s finger prints and bubble gum.
My car's the one without the booster seats in the back.
My car is clean inside, and that's a sad fact.

‘Cause it’s another crappy fathers day in a sexist town,
Where the women get the children and Dads are outward bound!

I drove to the shops to get my mind at ease.
And everywhere I turn, I see children with their daddies.
Men know at the end of the day what they'll become.
They'll become weekend daddies, while the children live with their moms.

‘Cause it’s another crappy fathers day in a sexist town,
Where the women get the children and Dads are outward bound!

‘Cause it’s another crappy fathers day in a sexist town
Where the women get the children and Dads are outward bound!

(Available as a downloadable MP3 file fathersday.mp3 (3,374kB))

---

8. Men are all sick bastards

I want to get him arrested.  The bastard's coming round again.
He wants to see his children more than every second weekend.
Oh what a sicko! For he loves his children, yeah.
I want to get him arrested.  The weirdo's too much to bear.

Men are all sick bastards,
Especially those ones who care.
I think the ones who love their kids
Should be in psychiatric care.

I'm gonna get the system to help me get this weirdo outta sight.
The police and lawyers can help me win this fight.
Why couldn't I have married someone who doesn't love his kids.
A cold hearted man who would be happy to be rid.

Men are all sick bastards,
Especially those ones who care.
I think the ones who love their kids
Should be in psychiatric care.

The love he has for his children I do not care about.
I'll do my best to destroy it.  I think I'll phone the cops tonight.
Dads are not important in a child's life.
I'm gonna convince that judge that he's been causing strife.

Men are all sick bastards,
Especially those ones who care.
I think the ones who love their kids
Should be in psychiatric care.

Everyone knows a mom knows best; a mom’s place is in the home.
She was born to be a mom to provide a proper home.
Her judgment is final; she's a biological reductionist.
She's the owner of the kids so, hit the skids.

Men are all sick bastards,
Especially those ones who care.
I think the ones who love their kids
Should be in psychiatric care.

(Available as a downloadable MP3 file sickbastards.mp3 (2,440kB))

---

9. Nuts

I'm hopping mad and I'm angry.  I'm pissed off as well.
Society says I've a problem.  They say that I'm unwell.
I've been upset, distressed and cranky for a year or so.
So I went to a counsellor to let him know.

He said: I'm not in touch with my feelings,
And I just can't communicate.
I've got low self esteem and anger,
And I've been losing weight.

The shrink started interventions and therapy,
Asking lots of questions about my reality.
He said that I was quite unstable, and I wasn't before
She took my children and walked them out the door 

He said: I'm not in touch with my feelings,
And I just can't communicate.
I've got low self esteem and anger,
And I've been losing weight.

I said, Shrink, my children they miss me, well it’s simply not good enough.
This is really hurting them and they think it’s really rough.
The shrink he got to thinking and he said you must accept
The situation.  You know its for the best

He said that I'm not in touch with my feelings,
And I just can't communicate.
I've got low self-esteem and anger,
And I've been losing weight.

So I did me some thinking, and I grabbed him by the nuts.
I squeezed real hard and watched him.  I said, you really should adjust.
You'll learn to accept me squeezing, and it's really for the best, you know.
I think you might need some therapy, so out of here we go.

Shrink, y’know you should be in touch with your feelings,
And you just can't communicate.
You’ve got low self esteem and anger,
And I've been losing weight.

Then we left his office, and I've never let them go.
I keep right on squeezing them, and he's starting to know.
Well, he's still in agony but I think he understands,
The pain that I go through daily, ‘cause my nuts are in society's hands

10. Big Mistake

I'm standing on the top of Castle Hill tonight.
I can see all around, I can see the city lights.
My heart is aching, my head’s about to explode.
I feel drawn towards the edge by this heavy load. 

Several years ago my kids were taken from me.
I see them once a week like rented property.
All I've ever wanted was equal custody,
Yet she and society fight to keep the kids from me. 

No one seems to understand what I'm going through.
No one seems to care about my children too.
Everyone says you're a man, why do you want your kids?
All I can come up with is: society is sick. 

So I'm standing here alone in complete despair.
I've gone through all the channels, and I've spoken in every ear.
No one will listen, and they just don't seem to care.
Congratulations, you've won, as I jump into the air. 

As I plummet to the ground to my certain death,
I have second thoughts, my life wasn't such a mess.
As I hit the ground, I'm met by ghosts of other Dads.
They all embrace me, but I can tell they are not glad. 

I wish I had not jumped, but now it's all too late.
I wish I'd stayed alive to change my children's fate.
My pain has ended, but my kids’ has just begun.
I can't change anything, now the system's truly won.

11. Men Out There

Hey men out there, do you really care,
Or could it be you don't yet know
About the loss of children, it makes me feel sad,
But reality is that you're a Dad.
They consider children property,
Weapons to be used against you and me.
Of your love for your kids,
Well they don't care.
It's not in their nature.
They don't want to share.

Think of the children, don't think of you.
Think of the pain they're going through.
Anything less than joint custody
Is a form of neglect; why can't they see?

Yes, they're gonna take your kids away,
Destroy your life -- you ain’t got no say!
Weekend access is the best you'll get,
But first you're gonna have to pass their test
Now, the standard lie that they can take,
Is to sign to her "for the children's sake."
Yes, the precedence set, they've got the kids.
Your home is gone and you're on the skids

Think of the children, don't think of you.
Think of the pain they're going through.
Anything less than joint custody
Is a form of neglect; why can't they see?

You struggle hard just to keep your job,
Your heart is breaking 'cause your kids are gone.
You know their pain you can feel it too,
The entire system seems against you.
If you thought of this society,
Of equal expectations, of being gender free,
Think again sport, it's a bit of a farce.
The kids best interests seem to come last.

Think of the children, don't think of you.
Think of the pain they're going through.
Anything less than joint custody
Is a form of neglect; why can't they see?

The same old story, they've lost their dad,
And one more thing just to make you feel glad,
Child support, is what you must pay.
It's docked from your wages as of today.
You're a piggy bank and that's your lot.
Your children's love for you they will not
Consider in any reasonable way.
In their mother's life they are to stay.

Think of the children, don't think of you.
Think of the pain they're going through.
Anything less than joint custody
Is a form of neglect; why can't they see?

She'll probably try to steal away your kids,
So she can use the system to put you on the skids.
The children are her weapons to have power over you.
Reverse the situation, but it's very hard to do.
Social security for food and rent,
A bloody good solicitor, a lot of common sense.
Be there for your children, throw away your job,
And into the system you must firstly lob.

Think of the children, don't think of you.
Think of the pain they're going through.
Anything less than joint custody
Is a form of neglect; why can't they see?

Now that you've established temporary custody,
The haggling will continue for what seems eternity.
And you will have the power, the system in reverse.
The thing you must remember, is to put the children first.
If you can both see reason and really want to do
The best thing for the children, it's entirely up to you.
Failing stable marriage, the next best thing will be
A sacrifice from both of you: equal custody.

Think of the children, don't think of you.
Think of the pain they're going through.
Anything less than joint custody
Is a form of neglect; why can't they see?

Think of the children, don't think of you.
Think of the pain they're going through.
Anything less than joint custody
Is a form of neglect; why can't they see?

---

12. Father's Love

A stranger came into my life today,
Ending what had been hurting me badly,
Returning the part of me that was missing.
That stranger was my very own Daddy.

And he said, Son/Daughter I love you, not a day went by
That I did not think of you, and that I did not cry.
Please forgive me.  Do you know I was forced away?
I've lived every second of my life for today.
To see again the little boy/girl who was my best mate,
Now a man/woman, how I prayed I would not be too late. 

I want to be your friend again.

And I said Dad I love you, not a day went by
Yes and I forgive you.  I know you were forced away.
And I've lived every second of my life, for today,
To see again the loving father, who was my best mate,
Much older than I remember, and no, it's not too late.

I'd love to be your friend again.

[Sung twice; once by a male voice and once by a female voice.  First verse then repeated by both voices]

Ordering the CD:

If ordering from outside of Canada, make sure to send an international money order.

Walter H. Schneider
Box 62
Bruderheim, Alberta
Canada 
T0B 0S0

References

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Updates:
2007 12 22 (reformated)